Riddles share. A salesman had to make a cold call in a city he had never visited. Of course, you can always text these funny jokes to the friends you've already made. ; Employee development Grow and retain your people with the only personalized solution for effective, continuous development. as they get ready to fire up some Smash Bros. Mario notices Luigi has a new avatar. 20 of the most absurdly funny quotes from Nathan Barley Why did the baby strawberry cry? These funny Laffy taffy jokes are kinda silly like Dad jokes! Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. You have to be the tastiest burger I've ever had. What did the football coach say to the broken vending machine? Love animals? Because it would be a foot. Trivia Questions Mistle-toes. Leave the pizza in the oven. When is a door not a door? Instead of it being funny or predictable, it could be dry, logical, or even dark. He wanted to make a clean getaway. They planet. One day the airport was fogged in and they were stuck in the hangar with nothing to do. Australia 16. What kind of shoes do robbers wear? Why did the photo go to jail? If you see a robbery at an Apple Store does that make you an iWitness?! Doctor, doctor! 39 of the greatest Brass Eye and Day Today quotes That makes the score, if my calculations are correct, 4 3! Why cant you explain puns to kleptomaniacs? Why shouldnt you write with a broken pen? Sports Anti-jokes, on the other hand, are humorous because the person on the other end doesnt expect its punchline. What kind of ghost has the best hearing? Why did the robber jump in the shower? I have no idea; I dont speak French. You can find her byline on pieces about grammar, fun facts, the meanings of various head-scratching words and phrases, and more. Hes only got little legs. hide. How does NASA organise a party? When you get hit by a guitar truck, is it a fender-bender? I hate Russian dolls so full of themselves! Historians believe that most pirates were most likely illiterate. Why does a chicken coop only have two doors? 4. There were three movies, and a couple of short films too. A soldier survived mustard gas in battle, and then pepper spray by the police. What do Michigan autoworkers do on Cinco de Mayo? It will show everyone youre funny and prove you have a great sense of humor. Hes always lion. He stopped at the local church because he heard they had a job available. What does a baby computer call his father? Aw, shucks! They fast. Ill never part with it!. What do you call a bear with no teeth? When its ajar. I went on a once in a lifetime holiday. He was just going through a stage. What does Charles Dickens keep in his spice rack? Why should you spend all your Sims time on the creation screen. What do you call a man that irons clothes? What do you call a priest that becomes a lawyer? Hes now a seasoned veteran. She couldnt control her pupils. Man, these effective funny love jokes are sure to warm her heart. What do you need to be able to drive in the outback? Why did the golfer bring an extra pair of pants? Best smash jokes. Thanks! Im friends with 25 letters of the alphabet. It doesnt have atmosphere. They pass a graveyard, and deciding its the only place they can be sure nobody will see them, they go in. Its from Uncle Ben. What do you call someone with no body and no, Best corny jokes that will make you laugh aloud. Whats orange and sounds like a parrot? Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information. I mean, really. My guess is you laughed out loud . If youre unfamiliar, this is the (rather dark) way that joke usually ends, plus more chemistry jokes. How many other jokes can one make off 'Man walks into a bar?'? The series was a smash hit, garnering much acclaim and numerous Emmys over the course of its 11-season run. That is precisely twice as many as last year., The game is balanced in Arsenals favour., The referee is wearing the same yellow-coloured top as the Slovakian goalkeeper. By accepting all cookies, you agree to our use of cookies to deliver and maintain our services and site, improve the quality of Reddit, personalize Reddit content and advertising, and measure the effectiveness of advertising. With bookworms. but roses can also be many other colors, including yellow, pink, and white; and violets actually look more purple than blue, hence their name. She took the carb-orator off my car! But hay its in my jeans. Customers are down and costs are soaring. I rang the doorbell and his mom answered. Sorry, we dont serve food here.. Whats the best way to burn 1,000 calories? Kids may not know how to drive, but that doesnt stop them from loving cars any less. 8 years ago. As the football season draws to a close, so too will the career of one of the sports most instantly recognisable voices. Fruit flies like a banana. 30 of the best-ever jokes about Scotland from Scotland. Why did the chicken go to the sance? Hes Being Hot & Cold: Reasons Why & What To Do AboutIt, Best Narcissism And Gaslighting Movies, TV Shows, And Books Thatll Blow YourMind, 5 Trans Romance Movies That Get Their Happy Endings (And Where To StreamThem), Make This The Year You Change Your Life With Brianna Wiests New Daily MeditationBook, 6 Things People Dont Realize Youre Doing Because Youre a Complex TraumaSurvivor, To The Mother Figures In Our Lives: You Made Us Who We AreToday. He tells them "Boys, I'm so. One day Greg arrives at work with a black eye. You did say I should surprise you, right? 14. First is to clear the exotic fish pool of weeds. Why did the teddy bear say no to dessert? Police are telling people to be on the lookout for 8 hardened criminals. Move over, anti-jokes. 4. Vehicle She kept running away from the ball! Shocked, the couple hastes to the old mansion and knock on the door. What type of brief packs a punch? My sweetheart is always taking health food crazes too far. @AntiJokeCat. What did one hat say to the other? Workplace. A father-in-law. A nervous wreck. When I wrecked my last car, I solved the mystery of whether or not a Mercedes bends. Its a rip-off. These clever jokes will instantly make you sound smart. 50 of the funniest Friends quotes and jokes, 28 Star Wars jokes that will make you laugh (and cringe) What playground game do little sims play? What did the science book say to the math book? He doesnt want to be spotted. 30. Where does the electric cord go to shop? He drank his coffee before it was cool. What did one toilet say to another? Sometimes you just want to make somebody laugh, but are pushed for time. They were below sea level. He took out an empty bottle and smashed it onto the wall swearing, "you are the reason I don't have a wife. Learn the secrets to telling a great joke, straight from stand-up comedians. After removing the pickles from her burger, she cut them in half. 31 Best Man speech jokes that will work for any wedding28 Star Wars jokes that will make you laugh (and cringe)41 of Bill Baileys most gleefully funny jokes and one-liners25 hilarious dad jokes youve probably never heard before40 of the funniest jokes about Brexit25 of Spike Milligans greatest gags100 of the best clean jokes and one-liners25 of Peter Kays most ingenious jokes and one-liners26 of Stewart Lees most gloriously acerbic jokes49 of Monty Pythons funniest jokes45 of Ricky Gervais funniest jokes17 of Ken Dodds most ingeniously funny jokes27 of Sarah Millicans laugh out loud jokes50 of Jimmy Carrs funniest jokes and one-liners50 of Milton Joness most ingenious jokes and one-liners50 of Tim Vines most ingenious jokes and one-liners50 of Frankie Boyles funniest (and darkest) jokes25 of Charlie Brookers most cutting jokes and insults25 of Lee Macks wittiest jokes and one-liners75 of Billy Connollys best jokes, one-liners and quips30 of the best-ever jokes about Scotland from Scotland, 64 of the funniest Seinfeld quotes to sum up everyday life100 of Homer Simpsons greatest quotes50 of Terry Wogan and Graham Nortons most scathing Eurovision quotes27 brilliantly funny quotes from This Country50 of the funniest (and most puerile) quotes from The Inbetweeners20 of the most absurdly funny quotes from Nathan Barley39 of the greatest Brass Eye and Day Today quotes25 of the most outrageous Summer Heights High quotes25 of Rik Mayalls greatest quotes25 of the funniest ever Still Game quotes50 of the funniest Father Ted quotesRed Dwarf: 30 of the funniest quotes and one-linersDerry Girls: 35 of the funniest quotes and one-liners25 of the most cantankerous Martin Crane quotes from Frasier25 of the most textbook Alan Partridge quotes50 of the best lines from Peep Show20 of The Young Ones most gloriously silly quotes20 of Malcolm Tuckers most cutting insults25 of the greatest Absolutely Fabulous quotes, darlingThe 20 most nonsensical quotes from the W1A team50 of the funniest Friends quotes and jokes. A brick. Best smash jokes. Megha is the heart of funnyjokestoday.com - When waking up in the morning, her first thought always is how to create a smile on someone's face before breakfast. Toughest job I ever had? With occasionallyAlan Partridgeesque results. Video Game Jokes. The Most Awesome Race Car Toys And Tracks For The Kid Obsessed With Racing. None of them know anything about it.*. Christian Bale. Click here for more information. Tomb it may concern. So I stopped, drank the whole bottle and carried on my way. Ive decided to sell my Hoover it was just collecting dust. Happy Birthday Jokes How come you didn't get me a birthday present? Cops smashed my phone. With any luck, you'll see her crack a smile. I dont know, but the flag is a big plus. A walkie talkie. Why did the bike fall over? For me, I'd rate them Less than Jake but Better than Ezra. **A man doesn't come home one night. Diddly-squats. 10. Too many cheetahs. How do you make a tissue dance? A carrot. She constantly cries, begging me to stop. How does the moon cut his hair? What do you call banana peel shoes? No more Mr Rice Guy. Tim Vine, My mother made us eat all sorts of vitamins and supplements. George will pay anyone $5000 cash to anyone who can bring him something absolutely harder than his dick. My granddad has the heart of a lion and a lifetime ban from London Zoo. because your bacon makes me giddy! My New Years resolution is to get in shape. I told my friend 10 jokes to get him to laugh. Youre under a vest. Bring him flours. The wheels touch the tarmac and before you know it they're off the other end. My Grandmother's favorite saying was actually a song. These what do you call jokes are funny on purpose, though. Mrs Claus was bugging him about something. You cant iron them. Why cant you give Elsa a balloon? Quotes From Famous People When they need to vent. level 2 Shulk on the bottom of a boat: I'M REALLY KEELING IT. Rocket League Jokes. A bulldozer. Within a few seconds, they were in a fistfight. Theyre perfect for any age group. They can make anyones day! Whenever we'd start talking and she didn't want to hear it she would sing, "Oh the monkey wrapped his tail around the flag pole, to wipe his butt hole, and see the world! What kind of music is scary for birthday. Two whales walk into a bar. Posted by. On the bottom floor, I saw a couple throw a load of rubbish out of their car window.I couldn't believe my eyes. 2. Should have gone to Specsavers. , but I feel like I was just born with mine. Two Cadillac drivers got in a fender-bender, got out of their cars, and then started yelling at each other. The other morning he wakes up in his bed, breakfast is waiting next to him, his clothes are neatly folded over the chair. Jokes to Message Your Coworker. Well, theyre not laughing now. A fridge. Why dont melons get married? 2023 BDG Media, Inc. All rights reserved. !" It was a long, dramatic, drawn-out way of telling us to shut-up. Shulk out fishing: I'M REALLY REELING IT. The horse had long dreamed of learning to play the guitar. That's all it was. Not only is it terrible, its terrible. Uncle Ben has died. Weve included some of our funniest jokes, songs and quoted below. Check out some more of our favorite walks into a bar jokes. The second one says, "I'll have one, too.". Never trust atoms. You must agree with me, right? Once my dog ate all the Scrabble tiles. Movie Characters How can you tell its a dogwood tree? Whats that restaurant on the moon like? The first one says, "I'll have a pint of blood.". A guy comes walking into a bar with a turtle in his hand.The turtle's one eye is black and blue, two of his legs are bandaged, and his whole shell is taped together with duct tape.The bartender looks at the guy and asks: What's wrong with your turtle? Loving these anti-jokes? Getting the ones with more fat will give you more flavor, but getting the leaner ones will make you look better. What runs but never goes anywhere? Archived post. Although, this being a friendly it doesnt actually count, so he hasnt quite done it yet., Ive lost count of how many chances Helsingborg have had. Time flies like an arrow. These hysterically bad ideas that actually worked out well are sure to get you chuckling, too. I have some bad news and some very bad news which would you like to hear first?". How do you tell if a vampire is sick? I saw this bloke chatting-up a cheetah. Here are some corny jokes to share with your friends and family. 3. The ones who are always putting the bite on them! What do you call an ant who fights crime? 40 of the funniest jokes about Brexit Top Jokes About Will Smith And Chris Rock At The Oscars Updated: Mar 31, 2022 We have put together a collection of the best jokes from the bizarre incident involving Will Smith and a right hand slap to the face of Chris Rock at the 2022 Oscars. "Luters, I expect. They each got six months. Funny Comebacks to Say Inspirational A pub landlord is struggling with the cost of living crisis. Elves werent working. Hes been told about it. A frog, because it croaks every day. These corny jokes shouldnt go over anyones head, even the youngest children in the household. What kind of music do planets like? Still, kids love playing with them, obsessing over them, and destroying the living room in the process. Data. What do sims have to pay for spelling books? Two chemists walk into a bar. What do you call an illegally parked frog? You put a little boogie in it. These corny jokes are great to share with the young people in your lifeand the old ones. 50 of Frankie Boyles funniest (and darkest) jokes That doesnt sound so bad. May 11, 2018 9:51 am (Updated October 9, 2020 2:45 pm) As the football season draws to a close, so too will the career of one of the sport's most instantly recognisable voices. Well it's my fault for having it on the dark mode. Expecting that one to end a little differently, too? Make no mistake, though: Good anti-jokes can be some of thefunniest jokes youve ever heard; the humors just a little different. Why cant you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom? By rejecting non-essential cookies, Reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform. Im addicted to Twitter! The doctor replies, Sorry, Im not following you.. Bless the viewer submissions, we had 0 smash = sex jokes.Follow my Twitch: https://www.twitch.tv/hopcatJoin my Discord: https://discord.gg/Pd5aPEkA8ZTwitter:. When they finally come to a stop the pilot looks at his co-pilot and says "That was the shortest runway I've ever seen!" John Motson announced late last year that hed be retiring at the end of the season, and his commentary for Match of the Day this Sunday will be the last time we hear the broadcasting legend commenting on a game. At the time, my son, who was 8 years old, ordered sliders. What did the cake say to the fork? Realising his employer won't be best pleased he disposes of the fish by feeding it to the lions, as lions will eat anything. Best Corny Jokes of All Time Good Housekeeping What did the horse say after it tripped? An Irishman walks out of a bar. What did the hat say to the scarf? Did you hear that Im reading a book about anti-gravity? 1. He walks up and asks "Hey, aren't you Billy Gibbons? They both have the same middle name. 27 brilliantly funny quotes from This Country Make sure you have hilarious puns ready so you can make new friends wherever life takes you. With ten-tickles. What did Cinderella say when her photos did not show up? What did one snowman say to the other? So what did you learn from this. Can you smell carrots? We dont serve your type! shouts the barman. None. I'm talking traffic cone huggin, pavement lickin kershnickered. They left a little note, it said Parking Fine. Tim Vine. How do you catch a whole school of fish? Bellhop. The person on the other end of the joke could see the punchline coming from a mile away. He wasn't as good as Smashing Pumpkins, but he made a splash. 31 Best Man speech jokes that will work for any wedding, 28 Star Wars jokes that will make you laugh (and cringe), 41 of Bill Baileys most gleefully funny jokes and one-liners, 25 hilarious dad jokes youve probably never heard before, 100 of the best clean jokes and one-liners, 25 of Peter Kays most ingenious jokes and one-liners, 26 of Stewart Lees most gloriously acerbic jokes, 17 of Ken Dodds most ingeniously funny jokes, 27 of Sarah Millicans laugh out loud jokes, 50 of Jimmy Carrs funniest jokes and one-liners, 50 of Milton Joness most ingenious jokes and one-liners, 50 of Tim Vines most ingenious jokes and one-liners, 50 of Frankie Boyles funniest (and darkest) jokes, 25 of Charlie Brookers most cutting jokes and insults, 25 of Lee Macks wittiest jokes and one-liners, 75 of Billy Connollys best jokes, one-liners and quips, 30 of the best-ever jokes about Scotland from Scotland, 64 of the funniest Seinfeld quotes to sum up everyday life, 50 of Terry Wogan and Graham Nortons most scathing Eurovision quotes, 27 brilliantly funny quotes from This Country, 50 of the funniest (and most puerile) quotes from The Inbetweeners, 20 of the most absurdly funny quotes from Nathan Barley, 39 of the greatest Brass Eye and Day Today quotes, 25 of the most outrageous Summer Heights High quotes, 25 of the funniest ever Still Game quotes, Red Dwarf: 30 of the funniest quotes and one-liners, Derry Girls: 35 of the funniest quotes and one-liners, 25 of the most cantankerous Martin Crane quotes from Frasier, 25 of the most textbook Alan Partridge quotes, 20 of The Young Ones most gloriously silly quotes, 20 of Malcolm Tuckers most cutting insults, 25 of the greatest Absolutely Fabulous quotes, darling, The 20 most nonsensical quotes from the W1A team, 50 of the funniest Friends quotes and jokes, When Mercury retrograde ends and meaning behind the astrological event, Irans secret war on British soil: Poison plots, kidnap attempts and kill threats, Disabled children locked out of 210m in savings as senior Tories demand trust fund rule change, Rishi Sunak to use coronation for diplomatic 'speed dating' blitz with world leaders, 'I was spiked and raped but saw no justice. As he does this a huge fish jumps out and bites him. She sells seashells on the seashore. Milton Jones. A lot. Still feeling funny? 7. Its been a long time since someone gave me such a stress test! I was involved in very organised crime. Milton Jones, I had a dream last night that I was cutting carrots with the Grim Reaper dicing with death. Tim Vine. Funny-ish Burger Jokes to Make Your Grill Go Round and Round, Motivational Songs of All Time That Were Made to Lift Our Spirits, The Funniest Eyebrow Jokes Youll Ever Hear: Laugh Your Brows Off, Top 30+ Avocado Jokes for Foodies That are Avo-Lutely Hilarious, Get Your Hoot On: 30+ Owl Jokes That Are a Hootin Good Time, Octopus Jokes and Puns That Will Stick With You Forever, Mountain Jokes That Are Really Hill-arious, Elevator Jokes to Make You Laugh on Many Levels. Chocolate Chip Wookiee. In addition to the 70 jokes below, we've also got dad jokes , jokes for kiddos , mom jokes , and jokes for holidays that you can share them with the youngest person in the room (be sure to bookmark our April Fool's jokes for next year!) Red Dwarf: 30 of the funniest quotes and one-liners Meghan graduated from Marist College with a Bachelor of Arts in English in 2017; her creative nonfiction piece Anticipation was published in the Spring 2017 issue of Angles literary magazine. Videos During Lockdown They sent material. . Help! Winter What sits at the bottom of the sea and twitches? 6. His wife's not home; the past few nights she's returned past midnight with increasingly elaborate alibis. You stay here. What do you call a row of rabbits hopping away? What do Kermit the Frog and Attila the Hun have in common? Why did the Clydesdale give the pony a glass of water? Music Second, there was a part of him-and I didnt know how potent that part might be-that thirsted for my blood. She had bad blood. [deleted] . I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day, but I couldnt find any. Tommy Cooper. Because Sakurai heard that smash players were attracted to miners. Submit your best joke here and get $25 if Readers Digest runs it. Psst! 50 of Milton Joness most ingenious jokes and one-liners ", when I suddenly remembered that since I had the SUV today, I was stuck with dropping our Great Dane off at the vets that morning. Cancel its credit card. What do you call Chewbacca when he has chocolate stuck in his hair? Why couldnt the frog find where he parked his car? ' Tim Vine, Somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. He was stuck in a vicious cycle. A palm tree. The engineer wakes up and smells smoke. I told the Inland Revenue I dont owe them a penny. 2010 The Thought & Expression Company, Inc. that will make everyone in the family laugh. Sense of Humor The toy factory was broken. His co-worker Mike says, "What the hell happened to you, man? What did the laundryman say to the impatient customer? save. Why did the man get hit by a bike every day? So we stopped playing chess. Matt Kirshen. What does a spy do when he gets cold? Privacy Policy. What do you call a snake wearing a hard hat? You had better bacon again if your burger isn't tasty enough. What is your opinion of burgers? Did you hear about the actor who fell through the floorboards? So grab some ketchup and enjoy reading these hilarious burger jokes! Two Cadillac drivers got in a fender-bender, got out of their cars, and then started yelling at each other. 25 of Peter Kays most ingenious jokes and one-liners When do computers overheat? The more they make me facepalm, the better. Animals You hang around, and Ill go ahead. Whats E.T. Youre drunk.. And you don't have to worry about these being clean: All of our favorite jokes are fit for kids and adults. In case he got a hole in one. How far do you think I can kick this bucket. Plus, baristas never, ever get it right. Why did the kid cross the playground? BODY ONCE TOLD ME. One said: Did you hear the. Why did the cookie cry? It really doesn't matter if it's a funny dad joke or a bad dad joke, the reaction is always the same. 25 of Rik Mayalls greatest quotes How do you make an octopus laugh? Funny Jokes Today Jokes Funny-ish Burger Jokes to Make Your Grill Go Round and Round. 25. Noticing the cobwebs in some of the dimly lit corners of the pub, he has a stroke of. Within a few seconds, they were in a fistfight. Why did the mushroom go to the party? ' Tim Vine. What do sea monsters eat? A bulldozer. Did you hear about the two guys who stole a calendar? I choose round. Sarah Millican, My wife its difficult to say what she does. Apparently he wasn't home because he was off studying with some other friends at their place. But if you chase cars, youll get exhausted. My guess is you laughed out loud at these jokes if you love hamburgers! Why did the stadium get hot after the game? Mr. Jones: "Oh jeez, I guess I'll take the bad news first.". A dino-snore. Why cant your nose be 12-inches long? What do cows most like to read? Theres 15 minutes to go here., The Czech Republic are coming from behind in more than one way now., Gary Lineker has now scored 37 goals. Toad. If so, read on to get your fill of funny anti-jokes. A soccer match. Last Updated: August 11th 2021. This bloke said to me: Im going to attack you with the neck of a guitar. I said: Is that a fret? The first guy says, I hear up in the Seattle it rains cats and dogs! Oh! the second guy answers. Attire. I was wondering, why does a frisbee appear larger the closer it gets? Especially if youve got hay fever. Milton Jones. These corny jokes will make everyone with a sense of humor laugh until their face hurts. The bartender said, Sorry, we dont serve breakfast.. He heads on down to see a long line of women outside, all waiting to get inside. Supplies! 20. Because they use honeycombs. I waited and stayed up all night and tried to figure out where the sun was. I just saw two zombies on a date. The more they make me facepalm, the better. these dark jokes, you might just be a genius! Short jokes, bad jokes, and even corny jokes play on words, puns, one-liners,. Why dont they play poker in the jungle? What do sprinters eat before they race? All rights reserved. Two men, one called X and the other called Y, are playing Super Smash Bros. What do you call a sleeping dinosaur? Im addicted to brake fluid, but I can stop whenever I want. 2021 Associated Newspapers Limited. A man tells his doctor, Help me. I thought: Hes trying to pull a fast one. Don't be a pesSIMist! That is wrong on so many different levels. Tim Vine, A cement mixer collided with a prison van. . A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. Why do we tell actors to break a leg? Because every play has a cast. They eat whatever bugs them. A priest walks up to him and asks him what are you doing son? The kid replies, Im killing these worthless god damn ants. The priest than says to the kid, God put all things on earth to have some sort of worth or value. The kid stops and the Priest walks away. Bored games. Stealing is bad and you should return it. Whats the difference between a hippo and a Zippo? Check out these physics jokes thatll make you wish you paid more attention in science class. It will be a low key funeral. Neptunes. I tied it to my bike to take it home, but on the way I realised if i fell off my bike, the bottle would smash. 17. First bird always wakes up early and can find bugs to feed himself and his family. 2. This is your captain speaking, AND THIS IS YOUR CAPTAIN SHOUTING. Never again. One day I nearly choked on part of The Sunday Times. Milton Jones. How do you impress a baker? Meghan Jones is a word nerd who has been writing for RD.com since 2017. If you laugh at these dark jokes, you might just be a genius! A pork chop. But if youre an English nerd, youll love these grammar jokes. What has four wheels and flies? What kind of cheese isnt yours? Last night me and my girlfriend watched three DVDs back to back. The lead singer of Smash Mouth is up late with a friend. What he finds convinces him they could notthe whole fire department consists of one old pumper truck and a bunch of volunteers he finds less than reliable. Why did the student eat his homework? Close. By rejecting non-essential cookies, Reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform. The only black character is incredibly two-dimensional, Because Sakurai heard that smash players were attracted to miners. What does a nosy pepper do? Its making headlines! No worries, we are here for you! They have eyes. Good news: After the wreck, your Audi is finally an innie. Friend of mine installed a new window in a local branch of Vision Express, then realised he's got the wrong place. 2021 Associated Newspapers Limited. Explanation: "No joke" has a double meaning here. About three things I was absolutely positive. What do you call an alligator detective? Why do bees have sticky hair? If youre looking for a good punchline, these why did the chicken cross the road jokes will do the trick. He wanted to find Pluto! 9. Food 75 of Billy Connollys best jokes, one-liners and quips Sometimes I tuck my knees into my chest and lean forward. One says, Wow, its hot in here. The other one says, Sure is. I used to be addicted to soap, but Im clean now. Stolen. So I had to put my foot down. When he reaches the ground, he lands safely. What did the elevator say when it sneezed? Ultimate. She told me to come in, so I did. Why was Cinderella so bad at soccer? Celebration Africa What do you call it when Batman skips church? He whispers it in you ear as he's standing behind you. The barman says theres three parts to the challenge. Helvetica and Times New Roman walk into a bar. Bacon and eggs walk into a bar. Fo drizzle! Archived. He found a nice little bar about a block away, sat down at a table and ordered a drink. What do you say to a frog who needs a ride? He parks on a busy street and leaves it in plain view in the back seat with the doors unlocked. Velcro is a complete ripoff.
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